Humbled
Everytime I'd watch the Oscars or Grammys, and the winner of an award would say "I'm so humbled to receive this..." I'd be very confused, and would wonder if the person knew the meaning of the word "humbled". Anyone else ever wonder about this? You'd figure that being humbled means that something happened that really put you in your place, and that in a way you felt embarrassed, and it got rid of your arrogance. Something like that, right?
Well, just a few weeks ago, I launched a Kickstarter Campaign for the very first time. Throughout the last few years, I wondered several times if I should use Kickstarter as a means of raising funds for recording. For one reason or another, I'd always put it off, but if I was being honest w/ myself the reason I didn't gravitate towards the idea was because I was afraid of failing and not reaching my requested goal.
Finally, last month when I felt that it was time to record an album, but realized I had no funds, I was left w/ two choices: 1. Get another job and save money for a few years (and delay my music career by another few years - or... 2. Ask for help
Initially when I discussed the idea of a Kickstarter w/ my friend Mike, I asked if I should set the goal to be 5k. Immediately, I felt like that was a HUGE risk, and if those funds didn't come through, I'd get nothing at all, so.. I'll just ask for 3k. Later on that week, as I started planning everything out, I remembered the words of my Pastor (Peter Ahn) at Metro Community Church: "If you're going to set a goal, you should set one that feels impossible w/o the help of God. Otherwise, you'll think you've done it on your own." You see, the original number I needed wasn't 3k or even 5k. It was something closer to 10k (and then MORE would be needed after that to take care of other post-production and manufacturing costs). So, as I filled out the Kickstarter information, I literally gulped and typed in 10k.
In one week's time, with the help of amazingly generous friends/supporters from all across the US and different parts of the world, we hit that goal - and the pledges are still coming in.
When I sat in my car and realized that we were going to surpass the 10k mark very soon, the first words that came to me were: I'm Humbled.
For the first time, it all came together, and I realized how those words work in this type of context. You see, everyone struggles w/ some form of pride - and for me, one area specifically is in that if someone does something nice for me, I have to repay them w/ something of equal value. If I can't or don't, I feel guilty and even shameful at times.
And so, when I saw the generous support of backers coming in at a rate where I realized I cannot possibly begin to repay everyone's kindness.... I felt small. I felt like I didn't deserve the support, finances, love, and all the kind words that were pouring in.
I was reminded of God's grace, and how I couldn't repay His kindness in my life - and how the only appropriate response to it is to do my best w/ everything I've been given.
So with that, I wanted to say thank you to every single person who prayed for me, posted and re-posted the kickstarter campaign on their facebook pages, twitter, and blogs, and helped fund this project financially through your generosity. Not only am I in debt to you guys, but I simply cannot pay it back. And so, what I'll promise is that I'll do my absolute best work on this album and I really do hope that people will enjoy the album and be blessed it as much as I have been to receive your support.
As of now, we still have 9 days - and so if you'd like to continue supporting please do so by placing a pre-order for an album, or continue sharing this link w/ your friends: http://kck.st/16HjEUJ
You can click on the link below to check out my Kickstarter Page.
So thankful for all of you!
Truly Humbled,
Koo