Fashion Basics 3: Trends

DRESS SHIRT
My wife came back home from Primark the other day and got me a gift.  I put it on, and it looked like I was wearing a dress.  Some of you already know what I'm talking about.  It was a t-shirt.  We both laughed while I looked in the mirror.  We tried to figure it out.  "Awww, is it cuz you're overweight right now"? 😂  Well, maybe.  But also it's cuz I'm short and if I had a big "A" on the shirt, I'd look like Alvin the chipmunk.  Maybe a tall slender hipster from California could pull this off, but the only was I was pulling it off was by literally physically pulling it off and returning it to Primark. 

Like many other instances in fashion, they're taking a simple idea to an extreme.  Tight pants were in, let's make it EVEN tighter!   Longish t-shirts were in, let's make it EVEN longer!  For me though, this is where I drew the line.  I draw that line often actually.  

To be on trend, or even ahead of trend is "cool", but what I think is even cooler is to be confident in my taste and think for myself instead of wearing what the industry is telling me to wear for the sake of staying on trend.  For example, a few years back, a certain type of color blocking was really in and I hated it.  I skipped that trend.   Before that, capris.  Why.  I just knew that was an immediate nope for me, even if all my fashion forward friends wore them.  Bottom line is, I don't feel like I have to prove anything. 

One other drawback of trying to be on trend all the time is that you end up paying for clothes at FULL PRICE!  The following are ways I like to find some sort of balance  when it comes to being on trend:

STAY CLASSIC
Some trends just look like they won't have staying power.  However, if I go with something fairly timeless, then I can afford to NOT buy that article of clothing until the end of the season when things go on sale, and enjoy it the following year.  Really, it's #NBD

DISPOSABLE FASHION (aka FAST FASHION)
If there's a trend I'm on the fence about (lets take ripped jeans for example), I often like to "try it out" by getting a cheap version of it at a store such as Primark or H&M.  If I love it, I'll invest in a nicer version of it later on.  Then I really take fit & quality into consideration!

TREND AT FIRST SIGHT
This past year, white shoes (sneakers) have been in again.  I liked the way it looked on other people, but no matter where I looked, nothing quite fit the bill for me.  I'm not sure why.  It might have been a quality thing, it might have been a fit thing.  But one day, I saw those Reeboks up there!  Classic - they reminded me of my childhood, and I knew immediately that those were the white shoes I'd wanted but didn't realize were an option that was available.  Took me a split second to purchase them.  Moments like those don't really come by that often for me when it comes to fashion, but it was definitely love (trend) at first sight.  Easy choice.

Quick pro-tip for those who cycle through trends often.  If you're just over it, and it's taking up space in your closet - sell your clothes to Buffalo Exchange (or shops like it).  You don't get a TON of money but at least you get something back!  

So that's it - these are the things I consider when it comes to fashion.  I don't know what it is, but I love when I can see these conscious choices being made by other people as well.  Maybe it's the attention to detail I'm noticing, or an unlikely combination of patterns and colors that I'm appreciating - but I love that fashion is so personal and that I get to have a small window someone's inner world by seeing what they chose to wore that day.  And..... THAT'S why I'm a fan of fashion :)

You do you.  Koo do Koo.

Fashion Basics 2: Quality

You get what you pay for.  This applies to everything, and especially to fashion. 

I'm not sure how often you go shopping for clothes - especially if you're a guy.  I know some people who don't go for a few years, and then just buy a thousand dollars worth at one time.   Although I might not end up buying anything, I would have to admit that I do frequent the mall relatively often.  And when I do, I quickly stop by my favorite shops and see if there's anything that grabs my attention.  

Up until recently, because I felt bad buying expensive clothes, I would often buy the cheaper version of the thing that I really want.  Does this make sense?  If not, let me back up for a moment.  If you visit lots of different clothing stores, you'll find that clothing companies make similar styles to each other (unless it's something very specialized and unique to a brand).  For example - if polka dot shirts are in, chances are you'll have at least 5 clothing brands to choose from to buy this polka dot shirt.  From afar, it might look the same - but you'll know the minute you hold it in your hands, it feels different (and fits differently too).  It might be something about the weight, texture, blend of fabrics, and small details (like buttons, etc).  And if someone got ALL those details right, chances are - it's more expensive.  

My wife would say to me - you got ANOTHER one of those shirts?  And at times it might be because I'm obsessive and like to have collections of plaid or denim shirts that are only subtly different from each other - but MANY times, it's because I bought a cheap version of something first, and it only lasted or satisfied me for a short amount of time.  Lets be real for a moment.  We're married, have kids, and share our finances, so I need to be responsible!  Any family guys feel me out there?  So, when I gave my explanation to my wife and said "it's actually because THIS is the one I REALLY wanted, and I saw it on sale today!".   It is then that my sweet, super practical, darling wife said to me the kindest words I'd ever heard from anyone:  "You should just get the thing you like instead of buying all those other options and cluttering up our closet".  If we were dating, I know men who would say to me "marry that woman"!

But here's why I love that:

(I'm going to connect the following reasons to something/someone ELSE that I'm a huge fan of and will write about separately one day)

GET WHAT I WANT
Really?  OK, sold!  Especially if it's going to be something that lasts me for a long time and will actually save me money in the long run.  Marie Kondo talks about how when deciding to throw away something ( to reduce clutter ), hold it in your hands and see if it sparks joy!  If it does, keep it!  If it doesn't, get rid of it.  There are several items of clothing/shoes or accessories that I own that I feel that way about, and in many cases - they're clothes that are high in quality and rich in important details.  If you're smart about it, you don't even have to spend a lot and might even find them on sale. 

DE-CLUTTER
This is something I want to get better at (and am trying to use the Marie Kondo method).  I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to try the capsule wardrobe method, but maybe one day I will!  Till then, I love that buying something I love ONCE will help me to create more space in my home!

If it fits well, and it is good quality - so far, so good!

Up Next: Trendiness & Price

Fashion Basics 1: Fit

SKINNY BONES CHUNG
That's what a friend used to call me.  And I secretly loved it.  😂There was about a 2 year stretch of my life when I was in optimal physical shape (for my own standards at least).  I wasn't quite six packin', but I wasn't flabby either.  But sheesh, it sure felt nearly impossible to sustain the lifestyle necessarily to stay in that kind of shape.  My crankiness was on a whole new level if I didn't have my little snack at the right times. #whatsmysnack -  Afternoon naps were a 'must' if I had an intense work out in the morning.  But I have to say... I miss those days, and maybe one day I'll try to go back to it - but for now, DAD BOD it is.  OK fine, let's be real.  It's just crossing over into plain old FAT BOD territory now! :)

I bring that up not just to humble brag that I once was in shape, but because I want to talk a bit about something I enjoy thinking about:  FASHION!  See, from time to time on this blog, I plan on posting about specific articles of clothing I'm into, or a fashion accessory I'm digging.  I might be getting ahead of myself, but if I'm going to share about fashion that I'm into -  I feel that I'm also gonna want to refer back to my own simple rules of fashion, so I thought it'd be fun to write about that first!  And as I like to do with everything else, I'm gonna start by over-analyzing things a bit.  It's just what I do.

DOES THIS MAKE ME LOOK FAT
So here's my starting point.  It might be something that's painfully obvious to many, and most certainly isn't rocket-science.  Years ago someone asked me, "Koo, when it comes to fashion, whats' the most important thing for you?".  My answer: "The way clothes fit".  Not super enlightening, but he scratched his head and said, "Huh... the way clothes fit.... interesting".

Let me get into it.  See, those years of being in shape was really difficult in terms of keeping up the lifestyle, but one of the most fun and rewarding things about it was being able to have more options when it came to clothing!   Currently I'm a medium for most brands, but back then, believe it or not -  I was a small or extra small!  (and those are also not popular sizes, so I always got to buy things on sale which was an added bonus!)

I should also mention that I was a small not only because I was thin, but also because of the fact that I'm relatively short.  I'm average short.  Not a shorty short short, but just kind of short.  What that means is that when I'm out of shape, mediums and large shirts fit fine around the torso, but then the problem is that I'll have sleeves for days, and my shirt becomes a short skirt - or with pants, way too much pant length (which means pants not tapering well- aka skinny jeans just become slim fit or straight leg).   This is because most of the fashion industry produces clothing for people who are in shape (or for mannequins).  Captain Obvious, right?

But wait, have you noticed that a specific size will fit differently from one brand to another - and then sometimes even within the same brand?   When you KNOW you don't fit in a small but all of sudden you do, it's called "vanity sizing".  Sizing is incredibly nuanced, (I just ignore tags now) and it is the very reason it's kind of a pain and a time suck for me to go shopping when I'm in Dad Bod mode, but I will pay attention to it because otherwise, the clothes will not only be unflattering, but it will also be a waste of money (more on that in a bit).

This is why people who care about fashion get their suits tailor made for them.  Suits are expensive!  If you're making an investment, wouldn't it make sense to get measured and get something that fits just right?  Fact:  A suit that is perfectly form fitting will make you look more slim than a suit that is too big for you (or too small for you of course).

For those who don't have money to throw out the window, this goes for regular clothes as well.  If like me, you've let go in your diet for a season, you would think that buying LARGER clothes is the best solution to cover up, you know.. the soft parts.  But this is incredibly far from the truth.  It makes things worse!  Unless you're walking around in a snuggie all day, you're not really hiding anything.  On top of that, if I'm wearing a standard tee shirt with sleeves that come all the way down to my elbows, on top of NOT hiding anything, I just look sloppy.  There are people who wear oversized clothing on purpose (and it actually looks like it's coming back into style), but in my case, that's not the look I'm going for.

So what do I do if I'm in that awkward place where certain sizes are too small, but the next size up is way too big.  Some more common sense:  keep looking to find clothes that fit me perfectly currently.  I no longer do that thing where I buy clothes that are too small with the wishful thinking that I'll fit into it in a few months.  It almost never happens.  Realistically, I just end up not wearing that article of clothing until I do fit into it properly, and sometimes that can be a long time - long enough for it to go out of fashion - and that is a waste of money!  I'd rather just reward myself with new clothes when I lose weight!   When I go through the trouble, I eventually find the perfect fit - especially when I go outside of brands I normally shop at.  For example, I was on the quest to find perfectly fitting black tee shirts.  I normally don't shop at American Eagle (it's for a weird reason too - I don't like when clothing companies slap their logo visibly on all of their clothing!).  But when I walked in to look around, there they were - a bunch of soft black tees that fit me perfectly even if I wasn't in optimal shape!  (and they do have a small logo tag on the bottom left, but it is subtle :))  The key is to put in those extra few minutes and try on a few things.  Really, don't just grab a medium when you're shopping online, just cuz you know that's your size.   Sometimes, even two different mediums of the same exact shirt fit differently!  I found this out by accident when I tried on a shirt, loved it, but saw that it had a hole in it, then grabbed another one, and it didn't fit right.  I thought I was going crazy, but it's more common than you'd think.  That's why sometimes I just grab two of the same item before I go into a fitting room.  Am I overthinking enough yet? 

With all this said, I would like to make something absolutely clear.  None of this is to disparage overweight people.  This isn't about body shaming. Remember, it's me, Dad Bod talking!  Nor am I trying to get people to be super-self-conscious.  In fact, it's when I wear poorly fitting clothes that I actually feel the most self conscious.  Ultimately, I just want to be comfortable and not draw negative attention to myself.  Comfort and fashionably fitting clothing don't always have to be mutually exclusive!

Up next:  Quality, Trendiness & Price